Sunday, November 04, 2007

I miss my friend

My internet has been funky for the last couple of days. Remember a couple entries ago about friends who don’t keep in touch? Okay, it’s been a long time ago. (Seen June 10, 2007 - Don't know what to say)

Anyway, I went to an event last week and another one this week that brought up a lot of old feelings and memories. And on top of those, I was looking through old e-mails and journal entries. The first event I went to was a marching band competition. It brought back a lot of memories from my three years of marching band. Then there was running into the current music teacher at my high school. I did end up going to the home coming game after all. That also brought back memories of all those long, boring football games that I had to sit through during those three years of marching band. But, this isn’t the first football game I’ve gone to since I graduated. I went to Homecoming two years after I graduated. I think. And I wanted to leave because of all the emotions I was feeling at the time. This time around, it was easier for me to be at the game. And this time around, I got to leave when I wanted to. Which was during the third quarter. But, I had a better experience this time around, too.

What was the point I was trying to get to?

I miss my friend. I miss this friend a lot.

What makes me more angry and upset is, this friend has moved again. I haven’t heard from this friend in a long time and I’m not even sure if the e-mail address that I do have is current. It was a work address and since it’s no longer where this friend works, it probably won’t work. Right?

For my graduation, this friend made a power point presentation for me. And that meant so much more to me than any card Hallmark could put out. But looking back on those e-mails and those words … how much did this friend really mean? Here we are years later, and I do have to wonder. If our paths were to cross, would this friend remember me? Could this friend remember me? It’s been a couple years. And I know that with all the people this friend comes into contact with, I don’t really expect this friend to remember me. After all, I run into people all the time who I do remember but they don’t remember me. Why should it be different with this friend?

And why am I putting this on my blog? I don’t know. I guess I just had to share it with someone. Since there isn’t anyone in my life I feel that I can share this with, I might as well share it with anyone willing to read my blog. I know this post jumps around a lot and probably doesn’t make much sense. Then again, I don’t make sense, this blog doesn’t make sense, so I guess together … we make sense (anyone know what movie that’s from? Okay, so it’s not verbatim).

Here’s two of the e-mails I found. The first one was sent to me just days after 9-11. The second one was the last question of an internet quiz/survey. You know, those things that have way too many questions but we sit through them and answer them anyway. The last question asked the reader, “what do you think of me.” And that was his response.

As we go through life, we often forget to say thanks,... we take things and people for granted, and often no one thinks anything of it. I gotta say right now that I'm grateful that God placed you in my life, I hope that we can maintain a friendship of some sort long after you graduate. I find that on some days you end up being a balancing force, and on others you remind me of my moral & spiritual compass. I know that if tuesday hadn't been unique, these words would never have seen light,... yet I feel that it is right that they now are here.
thanks again,
Love in christ,

what do I think of you? I think the world of you,.... you embody some of the finest qualities that i desire in friends etc. I have even stated that on occasion you have been my moral compass! i am grateful that god placed you in my life

From the power point presentation
Things I like about you …
*You live the example of Christ
*You always speak & act with honor
*You have given so much to me
* You have no idea how beautiful you are

Hope …
*Your future is bright
*You never forget me
*You get everything you desire
*Love finds you, and he knows just how precious you truly are
You are the best!
I will really miss not being able to see you every da

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