Thursday, May 25, 2006

At First Sight

I needed to be part of a story I know would end happily. Allie Parker, pg. 83

Ask me Craig! Ask me if I’m doing anything New Year’s Eve! I know it’s stupid and old-fashioned, but I’m one of those girls who like to be asked out by a guy. Julia Parker, pg 184

So, I just finished reading “At First Sight” for the umpteenth time. Last time I think I threw it against the wall. Don’t get me wrong. I love the story. I love Allie and Ben and Tim and Julia and Craig. I hate to be all “woe is me” in this entry… but man … that book sure brought on an onslaught of feelings. Mostly the kind where I feel hopeless. Of course I have been feeling hopeless for awhile now. It’s something that keeps coming back. It hasn’t gone away and I don’t know if it ever will. See… times like these I need another Parker figure in my life. That’s all I really need… really. Just an assurance that one day I will find that special someone someday.

Partly, I can agree/relate with Allie. Maybe that’s why I read romance novels all the time. I don’t have any romance in my life, nor do I have any hope of having any in my life. Perhaps that’s why I start writing these stories but never finished them. I dream of romance, but never expect it to happen in my life. The stories get started, but they don’t get finished because my own romance has yet to start, let alone finish. I need these stories because they have happy endings. The lead characters may get turned around and separated, but in the end I know they live happily ever after. They have a happy ending. Will I get a happy ending?
Maybe. But what if it’s not the kind of ending I want?

Once again… I have to remember all the good reasons why I should remain single.
Reese. I want my book back. (The book being "If Singleness is a Gift, What's the Return Policy?")

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